Saturday, January 21, 2012

Dear Asshat

Whoever sent this?
Mr. Smith,

Have you taken a good look at those photographs? The ones that you continue to post. You must, since you seem to be using some form of discretion when selecting them. God knows what that is.
But I digress. You appear to have an uninvited guest.
Tell me if the description sounds familiar: tall fellow, thin, generally lanky build. Snappy dresser, lacking a face entirely?
It is time to face facts Mr. Smith. Time to start running.
Do not delay.
I'm telling you once:

Of course I examine those pictures. That's why they're good. There's nothing funky in them. I mean, fuck, I avoid putting people in them all together when I can, so I don't know what you think you're seeing.
Is it the Loch Ness monster perhaps? Black Shuck? The Cu Sith? Granted, we're a little far afield for any of those so let's look a little more locally... a wendigo maybe, out to eat me? Or maybe it's dear Philip! Bigfoot? Nope, we're not on the west coast. It's really a shame, I'm not up to date on my folklore for this side of the pond. There's so terribly little of it.

Of course I'm being sarcastic you dumbfuck. Don't expect another response, I'm deleting those on sight now.


Robin Smith

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